“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to a new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom. Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.” 

Flavia Weedn

I recently came across an old DVD…Mom and Dad’s 50th Wedding Anniversary, 1996. Later, watching it alone in my room, I found myself on the rollercoaster between laughter and tears. The video was funny, heartbreaking, silly, uplifting, loud, poignant, and full of love. The longer I watched, the more I became aware of how many of the main characters had left the stage. Eight people died, two left via divorce, and five little children grew up! Not many of the original cast members remain.

I have reached the phase of life where more and more people leave every year…family, friends, and people I used to see in the neighborhood, at church, or in the movies. This time of losing eventually reaches everyone and is on the invoice for a long life. However, if we’re lucky and willing to take a chance, we can continue to add new players to the cast and create space for unexpected plot twists and extraordinary storylines that will surprise, delight, and inspire us.

Embarking on unexplored paths with new companions requires us to be vulnerable, trusting, and open to the mystery of unfolding adventures. Oh, sure, on our journey, we could find ourselves stuck axle-deep in mud with three flat tires and a GPS that says we’ve reached our destination, but we could also find ourselves on a mountaintop of amazement. You never know what lies around the bend. And so, what the heck…there’s not that much on TV anyway…might as well take the leap!

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives
For a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led to those
Who help us most to grow if we let them
And we help them in return.

"For Good" from Wicked

I didn’t hear his car drive up, but I watched from my kitchen window as he walked across the driveway toward my tiny condo, with an air of casual confidence.

He was of medium build, clad in blue jeans and a t-shirt. His hair was pulled back neatly and secured at the nape of his neck in a short ponytail, accentuating his beautifully lush, carefully trimmed, salt and pepper beard. As I opened the door, he greeted me with sparkling eyes, a warm, pleasant smile, and a confident, friendly manner that instantly put me at ease.

He was a good-looking man…charming, funny, and interesting. It was easy to be attracted to him, but…for God’s sake, he was my electrician and I was his client. At the recommendation of our local electrical supply store, “Call him first. He’s a really nice guy,” he had literally come to light up my life by adding two new overhead lights. At the time, I had no idea that he would bring more light than just that in the ceiling.

Over the next year, there were several infrequent text exchanges. He’d invite me for coffee or lunch, and I’d find an excuse to decline or postpone. I had been a widow for six years and was finally discovering how to make a life without a partner. Learning to dance with a wooden leg. I was not excited about the lines and wrinkles that were spiderwebbing across my face or the fact that my breasts had been losing territory in the constant battle with gravity. In fifty years, I had only been kissed romantically by two men…my husband and my high school crush at our tenth class reunion. I have never felt completely comfortable around men, especially attractive men, and the last men I was with…other than my husband, with whom I had grown old…were just babies in their twenties. No, I definitely wasn’t looking…as Carly Simon sings…but…somehow he found me.

After a long drought of messages, he reached out once again. “Would you like to go for coffee? We could talk about Scotland.” It was scary to say yes, but this time, I was ready for the adventure of meeting a man for something other than going over my taxes or my investments. I’d just go for coffee…chai latte, actually. It would be just a practice date, so that in the unlikely event another man asked me to go for coffee, I’d know what to do. Well…it didn’t turn out exactly as I planned. “Oh, I’m in trouble,” I told my sister, later that day. “I really like this guy.”

Our rather unconventional friendship has been such a gift. He has reminded me of things I’d forgotten and inspired me to make changes and discoveries on my own. He is funny, kind, and genuine. He opened doors that I thought had been nailed shut or were so hidden by vines and brush that I didn’t know they still existed. Who knew I’d enjoy the most passionate kisses of my life when I was a senior citizen! My world is larger, brighter, less scary, and more inviting because we traveled the same path together for a while.

None of us knows when or how our stories will end, nor do we know which characters will be with us on the final pages, but I’m enjoying writing this chapter, and I’m looking forward to seeing what’s on the next page. I smile at strangers and speak to people I don’t know, recognizing that just as in an English murder mystery, it quite possibly could be the least likely person who holds the keys to the next grand adventure.

 And now, whatever way our stories end
I know you have rewritten mine
By being my friend
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better? But
Because I knew you
Because I knew you
I have been changed for good.

"For Good," from Wicked

I have been changed by each of the people who have come and gone in my life. I’ve known people who made my life miserable, whose main purpose in life seemed to be that of a bad example. Then, too, I have long-time friends I don’t deserve, and young friends who bring excitement, joy, and new perspectives. Our human interactions aren’t always easy or straightforward, but they are completely worth the challenge. Old friends are stability and comfort, just as new friends personify potentiality and possibility. Embrace them both…the new and the old. Welcome the footprints on your heart and be sure to leave a few of your own.

Reminder: 
You're not done meeting everyone 
who's going to matter to you. 
Some of the best moments of your life haven't happened yet.   

Sara Kuburic

Isn’t that just the best thing you’ve heard all day?!